Speaking My Truth

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I've heard the phrase "speak your truth" many times before, and it's been bouncing around in my head the past few days. Sometimes, I'll write a little Facebook post, make a video, type up a blog post, and when I hit "publish," I feel warmth settle through my body and these words come to mind: "I'm speaking my truth. This is my truth and I'm talking about it. I'm not apologizing for it anymore. I've found my voice." I smile like an idiot because I'm so happy to have found my voice and my truth. I giggle to myself because I'm thrilled to have discovered these secrets.

It feels weird to finally be speaking my truth. Sometimes I go back and read through the things I've posted and think, "Oh geez, this sounds so hokey. People are just going to roll their eyes and think I'm cliche and stupid." But then I remember that the things I'm saying are coming from my heart. I feel them deeply. They are the truth. They may not be anyone else's truth because no one's experiences are exactly like mine. But the words I speak and write are my truth. They come from deep within my soul.

It feels strange to be giving my "soul words" a voice because I've almost always just shoved those words back into their box when they came to mind. "No, that's silly. That won't really help anyone. Just quiet down and let Fear keep us safe.." Sometimes I wonder if I'm just making it all up now. But that thrill, that warmth that comes when I speak my truth - that is powerful. That is new. That means something. The words I'm speaking aren't just a bunch of recycled sentiments I've jumbled together and thrown on a page. I'm letting my soul speak and it's powerful. I feel alive. I feel fully awake for the first time in a very long time. As Glennon Doyle Melton puts it, I am "unbecoming" everything I was scared into believing I needed to be. I am allowing myself to be my true self. I am loving me.

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